When I first called them a year ago they said that unless we were willing to use their pdoc (which I'm not) they could not provide any services to M. (It was all or nothing....) They also told me that they had no one on staff who had experience with FASD, so I gave up on them providing any support.
When things with M got so difficult a few weeks ago, I called the organization (BHI) who oversees ADMH (who provides the care through Medicaid) and complained that Medicaid was doing NOTHING to provide services to this very disabled child. I must have stumbled upon the right person to talk to at BHI... She not only said she'd call ADMH and talk to them for me, she even gave me her cell phone number and said to call if I had any more problems with them! I heard from ADMH within just a few hours, talking to a supervisor there who said they'd be happy to bend the rules for us (so we could keep the same pdoc) and that if they couldn't provide what we needed through their organization, they'd pay for a private therapist or program. In other words they did a 180 degree turn around and seemed willing to bend over backwards for us.
We did the intake a few weeks ago, and I was pleasantly surprised by the therapists who did it. One was the head of child and family services at ADMH, the other a regular intake clinician. They were both wonderful... understanding, patient with the kids, and very supportive of what we are doing (in homeschooling, keeping M out of the hospital, etc). They referred us to their "intensive in-home" team and we were assigned a case worker. The in-home therapist and the case worker came to the house yesterday to meet M and talk... Once again I was very pleasantly surprised... The case manager is VERY young, but very sweet and trying to be so helpful. She even followed M around letting him show her everything, so I could talk to the therapist without M listening in. And I even liked the therapist too! (I've been chewing up and spitting out therapists for weeks... it's amazing how many flaky people become psychologists!)
The psychologist "J" is older, obviously experienced, and very "real". He doesn't insist on being called "Dr. ___", his conversation doesn't get completely lost in psycho-babble, and he reminds me a little of "Columbo" (remember that show?). He obviously dresses for comfort, in kind of a rumpled way, and I noticed there was a whole in the knee of his pants... which he'd carefully patched. He seemed to "get it" right away, in terms of M and even has experience with FASD! I felt like I won the lottery... He's going to call back so we can talk more, and he might send "K" (the case manager) out for a few more visits... Not to gather information, but just to spend time with M so I can have a break now and then.
I'm excited... and hopeful that this is the beginning of getting some support to help us through M's inevitable rough spells. On the flip side though, I got cranky and fired the kid's pdoc. It's only a temporary firing of course... sometimes I just need a break from psychiatry. She's been so busy lately that she's been promising for a month to call (because both kids are really struggling right now and we need to talk about what to do...), but never calls. It's hard when she's busy like this because she tends to pop in and out of our lives. Just when I get used to her help, she drops out of sight again. It's easier to just take a break from her and reconnect when she has time to really BE there for the kids.
******************************************************************** Now for the interesting part... the caterpillars!
R has been finding monarch caterpillars down in our gully. She was so excited that she brought some home and we've been feeding them milkweed and watching them form their chrysalis'. Our first butterfly should emerge sometime this weekend (if I figured the timing correctly).
Here is one of our caterpillars... (R named the first two caterpillars Romeo and Juliet, but the last few she found have gone un-named.) He is probably about ready to stop eating and form his chrysalis.
One of the caterpillars hanging upside down "like a J" from the silk button he made, getting ready to make his chrysalis.
His chrysalis is finished. As it closer to time for him to emerge it will darken...
Here are Romeo and Juliet's chrysalis' with the rest of the caterpillars munching away down below.
This generation of monarchs (this should be the fourth generation of monarchs since early spring) are the ones who will migrate to Mexico for the winter... Unlike the generations of monarchs that emerged earlier in the summer, these butterfly's reproductive systems are not fully developed, so they won't breed and die out right away. Instead they will migrate south, reaching Mexico by December. They will "hibernate" there until February when the weather warms, then they will mate and begin their journey back north.
I'm excited for the butterflies to emerge so we can let them go, imagining the long journey they have ahead of them.
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