cloudy day update

The day is almost over. The kids are in bed, the dogs are asleep at my feet...the house is quiet, and the fire is burning down to coals.

 

 It's a balmy 75 degrees in here (thanks to the "blazing inferno" I've kept going in the fireplace all afternoon), but outside it's cold and wet. 

 The clouds outside are hanging low tonight. When I went out to feed the animals I couldn't even see the barn from the house, and when Grant came to me through the fog, he looked like a huge ghostly figure gliding towards me.... scary only until he whinnied, asking for his dinner. 

 Although the real clouds are hanging low tonight, the clouds of indecision, frustration and hopelessness I was feeling earlier are gone. I emailed the pdoc... very nicely saying no to making an appointment with the ECT doc, giving a couple of good and logical reasons why I won't, and thanking her for taking the time to talk to him. 

 The rest of the day was wonderful... I took the kids out for lunch (Mmm... Chinese food!) and let them buy and trade some Gameboy games at the game trading store in town. We got school done, and afterwards I made a nice fire and we sat, toasty warm, watching "It's a Wonderful Life". (The kids only watch it for me... but once a year it doesn't hurt them to keep me company while I watch it again!) I love that movie...

 

I'm sure the pdoc will want to talk about my decision... but that can wait. 

We're putting up the tree this weekend, going to church tomorrow night (and staying afterwards for dinner and line dancing, Yee Haw!), and Sunday afternoon we'll probably spend at the pool. I'll be too busy for schizophrenia this weekend... it will just have to wait.